I can’t say I enjoy it but each year I agree to do a Christian Aid collection through my church. I guess it is about playing my part or whatever. Anyway I put the envelopes through letter boxes on Monday evening and did a first collection Wednesday evening between 6 and 7.30 pm At least half were out or their bells were not working or they simply don’t open their doors. But of those that did open to me half of those swore blind that there had never had an envelope through the letter box, okay this was two days later so maybe it had decomposed in that time but in a previous year I delivered envelopes and went back 90 minutes later to collect and a lot of people still swore it wasn’t there even though they were standing on it. There is great potential in the material used to make Christian Aid envelopes, imagine if all crisp packets, sweet wrappers, newspapers and cigarette cartons were made of the same stuff. It would solve the problem of litter in that these items would just vanish when they were dropped, just as they do as they go through a letter box. I guess the only other people who are using the same product are printers of the cheques that are always in the post but never actually seem to arrive.
There is of course another possible explanation and that is that some people don’t want to give to Christian Aid and I respect that choice. All they have to do is say something like. “I don’t give to third world charity because it has overtones of quasi imperialist paternalism and it creates socio economic dependency in the indigenous populations and discourages the development of culturally relevant and geographically appropriate solutions to poverty and I personally have become reconciled to my guilt at the ravages of empire on far away countries,” and I would respond. “Can’t argue with your well informed, carefully reasoned and beautifully expressed argument and thank you for your time.” and move on. Or in fact a simple “Not today mate.” will do.
I just don’t like being treated like an idiot by being lied to. I am a big boy and I don’t need my feelings protected. I know that door to door charity collections are an intrusion so I don’t mind being told ‘no thanks I simply don’t want to give’ for whatever reason. I know in a few cases the dog genuinely has eaten the envelope but I find in those cases I get an apology, a request for a new envelope and money is put into it there and then. Just don’t tell me paper disappears into thin air please.
Another situation where nonsense is talked is when you are told that fancy martial arts techniques will work in a real life self-defence situation. But the raw truth is that violent confrontations are messy, unpredictable, frightening and potentially deadly. So you have to be ready to train for the unpleasant and unexpected and that is hard work and usually not very elegant and whatever you use has to be very simple and to the point. I will be bringing this element into the training in Oxford on Saturday and at the CQC training at the Summer Camp, you will have to leave your comfort zone but I would be lying to you if I claimed you could learn self defence without doing so.

